SIR BEAUREGARD aka BEAU played by CHRIS ASIMOS

 

Beau the hero of the movie. Gorgeous, affable, loyal and tough yet somehow he always ends up bound, beaten and captured. That is until he unleashes his secret weapon...

International performing artist , Chris Asimos has worked extensively on stage, television and film(Miss Fishers Murder Mysteries, Danger 5, Barassi: The Stage show). Recently returned from performing nightly in Las Vegas for the no.1 male revue in the world Thunder From Down Under.

REGINALD LUMPTON  III aka LUMP played by  MATT JONES

 

A character based on a legendary 19th century prize-fighter and eternal dandy. Always immaculately turned out, and reliable as a rock.

That is, unless his urges lead him astray yet again.

Matt Jones, stunt man, actor and rugged adventurer,

fight choreographer for films in America, Japan, New Zealand and Australia. Has worked with acclaimed director George Miller.

He is currently in production of his own television series entitled "Living The Dream" where he will be sailing around the world while encountering danger, excitement and much more.

SALOME played by SASHA  CUHAR

 

A femme fatale with something extra. Salome is an ace hand to hand fighter proficient in most martial and sexual arts, some of them previously unknown to man. A cross between Tura Satana and  Modesty Blaize, packing a good sized packet to boot.

As a multidisciplinary artist Sasha Cuhar is a poet, painter, writer, musician and actor. He began his acting career on the stage in Queensland and has performed in many plays including Shakespeare's Macbeth and Tennesee William's The Glass Menagerie. Sasha enjoys cheap whiskey, fine cigars the music of Leonard Cohen and playing electric guitar. He swaps his trade mark tight rock star leathers for the sweet satin cat suit of Salome.

KITTEN played by KITTEN NATIVIDAD

 

Legendary Russ Meyer starlet and erotic film goddess Kitten Natividad plays her namesake in the movie. The loveable madam of a rather unique bordello who’s lust for jewels is the driving force behind her son Beau's quest.

Kitten is Hollywood royalty. A golden girl form a bygone era, having starred in over 300 movies most of them xxx rated, she was the go-to bosom girl of the seventies. Appearances in Airplane I & II, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Up, Beyond the Valley of the Ultra Vixens, and Another 48 Hours.

Sean Penn was treated to an eye-popping, erotic performance by

Kitten Natividad on the eve of his marriage to Madonna.

HIJRA played by ARISH A. KHAN aka KING KHAN

Especially written for King Khan, the Role of Hijra as the foul mouthed eunuch assassin and the original owner of the Golden Cock.

Legendary Indian Rock and Roll star King Khan is one half of the infamous King Khan and BBQ show and leader of The Shrines. As Blacksnake he was a member of Canadian punk band The Spaceshits.

As music producer and performer he has worked with The Black Lips, Wu Tang Clan, Laurie Anderson & Lou Reed, film maker Oliver Rihs and 'Godfather of Black Cinema' Melvin Van Peebles.

ANNA MARGARITA + AZTEC HIGH PRIEST

played by  ROBERT 'EL VEZ' LOPEZ

 

The schizophrenic dual role of Anna Margarita the cocktail shaker and the High Priest of the Aztec she male worshipping cult performed spectacularly by actor, cabaret star and composer

Robert 'El Vez' López.

Robert Lopez is the world’s most famous Elvis impersonator El Vez.

(So famous he even has his own impersonators!)

He is well known for The Hangover (2009), Waxie Moon in Fallen Jewel (2015) and Americanos: Latino Life in United States(2000). Lopez got his start in music playing guitar for the venerated punk band The Zeros. As El Vez, he is known for his high-production-value, frenetic stage show, which feature numerous on and off-stage costume changes, and between-song monologues mixing humor and political activism.

 

THE NARRATOR: TEX PERKINS

 

Legendary Australian Rock star Tex Perkins takes the role of narrating the story. His synonymous dark, growling vocals have been the backbone of many influential Aussie bands: The Beasts of Bourbon, The Cruel Sea, Tex, Don & Charlie, The Dark Horses.

He currently has several musical projects on the go: The Ape, Far from Folsom, Band of Gold. As the Man in Black he is the top contendor for the Johnny Cash of Australia.

WANDA THE GIANTESS played by  AIMEE NICHOLS

 

Leader of The Chompers, a gang of Grotesque Burlesque acts and a power crazy Anal Nitrate fueled ogress.

Aimee Nichols aka Fatti Smith, plus sized burlesque dancer and leader of her own dance troupe Va Va Boombah, Melbourne’s first fat burlesque. Drawing on pop culture references to create memorable and occasionally horrifying acts. Also known as Harlotte Bronte, erotic novelist, her short story collection The Mercy of Strange Men: Erotic Stories was released in April 2013, and has been published in numerous anthologies including Under Her Thumb: Erotic Stories of Female Domination, Best Lesbian Erotica 2001, Ultimate Lesbian Erotica 2006, First-Timers: True Stories of Lesbian Awakening and Eroticus Magazine. She was previously a sex columnist for Voiceworks Magazine. Aimee fills Wanda’ s ample boots and character perfectly.

 

SQUIRREL aka SQUIRT played by OLIVER BELL

 

This was one of the hardest and most demanding roles in the movie and had most actors running for the hills with their tails between their legs. Oliver Bell took it all in his stride and cruised through the character. An awarded ballet dancer, Oliver has previously performed in the Australian National Tour of "Queens of the Outback" - a tribute to Priscilla, starred in the new musical "Freedom to Submit", was a lead dancer in the contemporary dance production "More to C", and the new musical "The Last Torch". He is currently starring as Peter Pan in Tokyo Disneyland.

LIEUTENANT HINDLICK played by LUKE CLAYSON

 

An intelligence operator of the Dullsville Dept. of Corrections, Hindlick is an ace torturer and technical slimeball.

Luke Clayson, a star of musical theatre as a child, he has worked with prestigious companies including the State Theatre Company of South Australia, Sydney Theatre Company, Windmill Theatre and Hit Productions. He's had various guest roles on television and works as a producer and writer with his own production company,

No Small Parts Productions.

BILLIE JEAN played by JUSTINE JONES

Billie Jean’s mean spirited, two timing, back stabbing, boot licking persona is portrayed brilliantly by Justine Jones.

Justine is a regular on 'Wentworth' TV series and renowned Jazz saxophonist.

She is leader of her own band The Playboys of Rhythm.

THE CHIEF played by PUGSLEY BUZZARD

 

The mean, despicable, violently homophobic but weirdly endearing head of Dullsville Police Force.

Wonderfully portrayed by Pugsley Wateringcan Buzzard, one of Australia’s best character actors and legendary barrel house piano player. Pugsley's distinctive gravelly, whisky stained voice with a Texan/Aussie drawl is regularly compared to Tom Waits and C.WQ. Stoneking Puggsley took time off from his many world tours to bring to life to the character of The Chief.

THE CHOMPERS + AZTEC ACOLYTES + THE ELVISES

played by GOGO GODDESSES

 

The GoGo Goddesses, divine dancers and in house dance troupe of The LuWOW Bar, bring their ample and seductive dancing and creative talents to the movie playing roles as diverse as the grotesque burlesque gang The Chompers, the dancing androgenous Elvises, and the Aztec Temple Acolytes.

 

Supporting cast on FAGS IN THE FAST LANE

Mc Bastard - Glen Maynard

Rosie - Hwee Hall

Sheer Khan - Barnie Medlin

Beardy Brenda - Jaz Wickson

Footsy Frieda - Tijana Dautovic

Siamese Twins - Vivianna & Ariel Martinez

Claw - Jordan Hallewell

Midget Marylin - Maddie Bowers

Squeak/Freak/Aztec - Aston Elliot

Mr Normal - Oliver Clark

Mrs Normal - Sarah Pass

Johnny Normal - Dylan Butler

Annie Normal - Charlotte Thompson

Chavs - Kristan Hilton/Tom Byers/Udonnis StVictor

Bandyleg John/Tradie/Beavervoice - Xavier Goualt